“Because my children are important to me, and my work is important to me too.”

I loved my career, it was my identity—that was until I had kids and it changed everything. After I had my first Marlie, I went back to work full-time and thankful the transition wasn’t hard because I had my mom to take care of her. Fast Forward to when my son Jaxson was born, 18 months later, and it changed everything. I was struggling to balance 2 kids under 2, paying for a nanny and feeling like I didn’t have enough time to spend with my kids.

I kept talking to myself thinking “just because I love being a mother, doesn't mean I don't value my work. And just because I love my job, doesn't mean I love my kids any less.” I would go back and forth on what to do. But one thing I knew, was that I wanted to be around them more because they are only little for such a short time, but while this was true, I needed to find a way to continue to make an income to help support our family and continue what I was passionate about.

Growing up, I always told my hubby, Spencer, that I wanted to be a stay-at-home mom and that is why I didn’t think I would have such a hard time with the transition. I struggled to find my identity again once I made the hardest decision to leave my full-time job. I knew that I had to find a way to continue to use my expertise and share my passion in fitness and health to continue to help people—hence why Sweaty as a Mother was born.

Now that it was been over a year since I left my job and started Sweaty as a Mother, I wanted to share things I have learned to help you find balance and succeed as a stay at home working mom. I learned that there are so many factors in the day that are out of my control and up to baby, the toddler,(aka my bosses) etc and is why it became of utmost importance that I scheduled my day to benefit myself and the entire family.

There’s simply no way around it… without a proper stay at home mom working schedule you’ll be running around like a madwoman.

That is why my first piece of advice is to:

1. Create a Schedule

It's important to line up your day carefully, with set "office" hours. Ask yourself how many hours you hope/need to work in a week? When will you return/make calls? What can you accomplish while your kids are playing or sleeping? If you have a plan, you will stick to it instead of getting distracted with dishes, messes or other things. With that being said, it is okay to push things around and go to the park, because trust me the kids have their own agenda, just know that you will work when they go down to sleep that night to finish up.

I have this weekly schedule that I follow and we also have mini routines everyday that the kids even know and we all know what to expect when.

Some examples of our Mini Routines Throughout The Day are:

• Our Breakfast routines. I know what I am making the kids and I since I plan out the meals ahead of time, they know once we finish we clean up and go on a walk with the dog.

• Snack routines. They know I always pack their snack packs. Depending the day, they know where to eat the snack, and then what happens immediately before and after it.

• Post nap or rest time routines, we always go on a bike ride or to the park.

• Dinner time routines. What’s for dinner which we plan out weekly, they get to do a craft or help me cook, sometimes they will watch an episode of Sesame Street!

• Bath and bedtime routines. We do bath immediately after dinner, PJ’s, brush teeth, book, and then bed.

2. Prioritize Sleep (for yourself & the kids)

No matter how great your routine or schedule is, if you’re missing out on vital hours of sleep, you will struggle. I am not a very patient or happy person when I have lost out on sleep. Yes, a lot of it is out of your control and in the hands of your little ones, but making sure that you prioritize your children’s sleep and your own will help you so much. This means set nap times for the kids and maybe even a power nap for yourself, set bedtimes and bedtime routines. This has worked wonders for us and the kids know when they are suppose to sleep and it isn’t much of a struggle since they know what to expect. Again, there are regressions and moments when we are struggling to get sleep because the kids are sleeping less, sick or just off routine, but that is parenthood!

This also means getting to bed at a reasonable hour. I use to stay up till midnight and wake up exhausted and feeling drained to do it all over again. Although I was getting in a lot of hours, it wasn’t quality work and I was just running myself into the ground. I found that I worked harder and smarter if I spread the hours out more evenly throughout the week and even on the weekends.

3. Use Nap Time Wisely

This is one chunk of the day when you can (most of the time) expect to be able to get work done without interruption. Whether your kiddos sleep for one hour or three, use this time to get things done like phone calls or things that you need to do without interruption. If for some reason my 3 year old isn’t tired, I have started “quiet time” instead and it has worked on those off days.

There are days when I use naptime to get a workout in, do dishes, meal prep or laundry. Although this is true, if I was working outside of my house, I wouldn't be concerned with anything but my work so I try and save that stuff for later because nap time is so valuable and when I get the best work done (because I am not as exhausted as I am at night haha). Since my business is all done on my computer or phone, I make sure to get as much of that done as I can at nap or after bed so I am not constantly on my phone/computer around the kids. Stay engaged when you are with your kids and schedule in the time for working on your phone/computer—it took a while for me to balance, but it has made such a big difference.

4. Set Boundaries

If you don't learn from the beginning to keep your roles as mom and businesswoman separate, it can leave you feeling like you're not succeeding in either role. It took me a while to find a happy balance, but now there is no looking back.

Ways you can do this are by making yourself a workspace away from any chaos in your house—that way you're not inclined to clean up or do other things when you are working. It will have you feeling less distracted and getting more done!

4. Get Creative to Keep Kids Entertained (from previous blog post)

I did a post a while back on ideas to keep kids busy so you can get a workout in and the same ones apply for when you need to get something done work wise and/or they don’t take naps or skipped a nap. You can read more about those ideas here.

5. Plan for Interruptions

Have a plan for when you are making calls, or on a deadline and the kids just aren’t having it. I had to realize that my perfect schedule will not always be so perfect and as the kids go through the many seasons that they do, you will need to have a backup plan. One thing that I learned was that I would try to wake up in the morning and work before the kids would wake up, but then I was getting almost “annoyed” when they woke up because i was being interrupted. I hated this feeling and had to stop doing that. For me it works best to work at nap times and after they go to bed.

6. Don’t be afraid to ask for help

You may think working at home means you don’t need child care, but trust me, you will have days when you need help -- and that's okay. I am grateful to have my mom here to help so I can look ahead at my schedule for when I need more time. I also have a sitter that I can text ahead of time if I need more help too. While I hate having to ask for help, it is necessary. My husband is so good about taking the kids when I need to get projects done or make client calls, but the demands of his job(s) and master’s program, make it hard to rely on that 100% of the time.

Another way to get help, is to ask your friends with kids who also work from home or stay at home if they are interested in switching off taking each others kiddos. I am so lucky to have such amazing friends who are always up for taking my kids for an hour or two if I need to get work done or even a workout in! Then I return the favor and take their kid(s)—it is fun for the kids and so helpful for the parents!

It’s easy to put everyone else’s needs before your own, and I have found that especially true when you work from home, people can perceive that you are more available than you really are. Most people don’t understand the amount of work that goes into things and that is okay. What I have had to learn is to not feel bad when you have to say no to things since that is when you have blocked off time to work.

7. Don’t Forget to Fill Your Cup

Last but certainly not least, I cannot stress this point enough—fill your cup! Whether you are a stay at home mom, a stay at home working mom or a working mom, motherhood is freaking tough and you have to remember to do the things you love that make you happy; it will make you a better mom, wife, friend. Make sure to take time to have date nights with your significant other to keep your relationship strong, spend time with your friends (your tribe), keep up with your hobbies and to take time off just like you would in any other job.

I love routine and our system really seems to work for us. There are always curve balls thrown and that is when I make adjustments and try my best to breathe and let it go. If my kids don’t sleep through the night or someone is sick, I make adjustments. I follow this schedule Monday through Friday, take more time off on the weekends to relax and fill my cup, I use Sunday to complete grocery shopping and meal prepping. On average, I work on my blog and business somewhere between 15-20 hours a week. Some weeks are less and some weeks are more. I love what I do and feel grateful that I get to share my passion and make an impact on others!

Typical Weekday Schedule

5:30-6:30 am — We all wake up and get dressed

7:00-8:00 am — Breakfast and a walk with the dog, pack snacks

9:00 am — depending the day take Mar to preschool and then train clients

11:00 am — take kids to park

12:00 pm —lunch & get out last bit of energy

1:00 pm — Nap time —I clean up from lunch and then get as much done on the blog, client calls, programming, etc

3:00 pm — kids wake up (this varies depending on the day)

3:30 pm — snack time and a walk or bike ride

4:30 pm — free play, while I clean up from the day

5:30 pm — dinner time

6:30 pm — bath time & hubby gets home

7:00 pm - 8:00 pm — bedtime kids are down

8:15 pm — finally get to start back up on my work— planning posts, social media posting to story, responding to DMs, emails, etc.

10:00 pm — on average, this is when we get to bed.

Marlie (3) is sleeping through the night, unless sick. Jax (1.5) has been sleeping well but recently has been waking up for water 2 times (dry winter air).

again this is what is “normal” or typical. It can all change in the blink of an eye and does change day to day!

I still have many areas for improvement when it comes to making sure I am focusing all of my energy on my work when I have the time. I am continuing to set goals and making sure to prioritize my sleep, my work and my relationships. It can be done, you can have it all, it is a grind in the beginning and eventually all of the hardwork will pay off!!

I hope you find this helpful when trying to find your balance and success! xoxo Taylor

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