How To Balance Your Life as a Working Mom
What an honor it is to have one of my best friends here on the blog today. She is not only an amazing friend and mother, but she is a kick ass CEO and founder of a successful IT staffing firm. She is my inspiration, my motivation and truly one of the nicest humans I know. She is sharing some practical tips for how to balance it all! You are in for a treat Sweaty as a Mother fam—
Hi everyone! A brief intro – Among other things, I am a mother to two beautiful daughters (Ashlyn (5) and Juliana (4)), a wife, and a Founder/CEO at VIA Technical a San Diego based, Woman Owned, IT Staffing Firm.
When Taylor asked me about writing a blog about balancing business and motherhood, my mind went in a million directions – where do I start?! Lord knows I don’t have it all figured out – but along the way and through each struggle and season I’ve solved problems and worked through challenges to keep going and also thrive in each season! I’d love to share some practical tools!
Whether you are a stay at home mom, a 9 to 5’er, own your own business or anything else we all know that we only have 24 hours in a day and raising human beings can literally take up every second. So how do we carve out time for our careers?
First, I’d like to preface that every mom and every family is different. What works for one, is not the solution for the other. I also believe in the famous quote of President Theodore Roosevelt that “comparison is the thief of joy”. But it’s always nice to hear other perspectives and see how others manage their time, use their God given abilities and achieve success (in whatever that may be!)
I believe in work/life integration; it’s a give and take. I try to balance my life with the demands and challenges it has; and that is day by day and week by week. There are days if not weeks where my children are “extra work“ or “more needy”. I give them more time. Then there are things at work that need my support more – new employees, new clients, more business, challenges, etc..
Well here are some tools I use to manage both, at the best of my ability – for now. The goal is to manage your awake time so that you can spend as much time with your children while being able to keep up with work.
Time Management/how to get it all done:
Seek help! I mean seriously, Wonder Woman isn’t real, plus she didn’t have kids, that I know of. No one can do it all. Whether it’s a part-time babysitter or a full-time day care or nanny or family member; if you work, you’re going to need help. I have found the best nannies on Care.com that have become part of my children’s life forever. Take the time to figure out what you want, interview and find the best childcare that you can. You’ll feel relieved working knowing that your kids are in the hands of amazing care givers that love them as well.
Lean on your spouse - Moms and Dads both work. Your work is just as important. Sharing duties is critical. From the kids, to the house, pets, dinners, etc. When you and your partner are in -sync and equal, it makes your life easier. Take the time to encourage, thank and lean on your spouse. They also sacrifice a lot, and lets face it, it’s very hard to do it alone. Like we say in business, in sports and at home, “team work, makes the dream work”.
Prep! I think structure and being prepared are key. On my weekends, I clean, organize, sort, and prepare for the weeks. Depending on the phase we’re in, it looks different. For school this year, I try to have everything ready to go. Outfit/bows/shoes/socks laid out, lunches packed, breakfast bowls/plates etc out on table and ready for a meal. When I drop them at school, it’s go time and I don’t waste a minute to get as much work done while they are at school.
Integrate your kids with your work/life – whether I’m working in my office, exercising in the garage, or running errands, my kids join. It might be more exciting for them to be at the Zoo (which we still do!) but when I have obligations such as work, self care or other items to take care of, the kids are a part of it. Less time away from them which equals less guilt as I want to be with them as much as possible!
Finding a different working schedule – this was a big one for me. Prior to kids I worked 10 hours per day and typical business working hours. When kids came, I was fortunate enough to be in a role (that I worked hard to get to!) where I had flexibility. My hours began to look different and through each season of motherhood they still change (based on ages, needs, activities, school, etc.).
Automate EVERYTHING- Luckily we live in 2022 where everything can be on auto-ship, drive up pick-up, order on your phone at night etc. I can’t tell you the last time I used my precious time to go to Costco and wait in line. From household supplies (Grove) to pantry staples (Thrive), lunch orders (Uber Eats) to weekly veggie/fruit delivery and weekly grocery shopping (Instacart) I save HOURS each week doing tasks that someone else can do for me and my family. If you know your billable rate then it’s easy to pay someone else to do these things (you save money!)
Relax and let your kids watch TV or use their iPads. The reality is, I have to get things done. And when I need to, I let them use their iPad. If I don’t make it a big deal, many times I’ll find they put them down and go play with toys. Yes, it’s a free babysitter, but a little screen time isn’t going to kill them IMO.
Practical tools are great, but the heart and mind need help too! I have found that support is key when you’re a working Mama!
Have a tribe of working Moms to support you – No one else really can understand a working mom, other than fellow working moms. I love hearing from strong, confident, happy, thriving working mamas that are also devoted to their family – it can be done!
Give yourself grace – This is really cliché, but man it’s true. I’m not a crier, but I’ve lost it many times when I would drive away to work with my children crying that they didn’t want me to leave. It broke.my.heart. I contemplated if what I was doing was right. Then I pulled myself together and remembered all the reasons I choose to work and we make it through that “season” stronger. (and note, they are FINE within a minute after I leave 😊)
Coaching – I hired an Executive Coach for my business, and in addition was blessed in that she also helped me normalize my feelings and my situation as a working mom – she had been there/done that! She’s the one that taught me tools like transition times – giving kids and myself time to regroup (for me) and a heads up for change (for the kids).
I’ve been fortunate these past few years to work from home like many of us. That has allowed me to share in all the little moments throughout the day and integrate work and motherhood even more. That has been a huge blessing!
My children are growing so quickly, and I already miss their baby stage. I know this phase will go quickly as well, and eventually I’ll be an empty nester with more time on my hands and plenty more to devote to my work. When I have a tough time balancing the demands and stressors in life, I remind myself that there is a season for everything. This season is full, demanding and more beautiful than I could have imagined!
Cheers to your careers and being the best moms we can!
Natalie Viani
Mother to two beautiful daughters (Ashlyn (5) and Juliana (4)), a wife, and a Founder/CEO at VIA Technical a San Diego based, Woman Owned, IT Staffing Firm.